How is a mama to get time to herself? With a busy now-13-month old running around, it's not easy. She is busy, busy, busy being a little scientist, undoing most of the work I try to get done around the house, and clinging to me like a cute little monkey when I attempt to leave the room. Think, mama monkey swinging through the trees, baby monkey holding on as tight as she can so she doesn't fall. Yep, that's what we're going through right now. Normally she loves the shopping cart at the grocery store, but on our last trip she screamed whenever I tried to put her in, and even wanted to nurse halfway through shopping, just like when she was a teeny tiny newborn. It's a 13 month old thing.
And studio time? Yeah, no. Don't get me wrong. We spend a little time in my studio most days. She likes to climb up the steps, keys in hand, and attempt to unlock the door herself. I can do a bit of straightening up or hang half of a curtain while she gets into my old business cards, spreads them around the place and finally gets bored and starts to chew one of them up. We do some coloring and exploring together. But I'm not going to get any of my own art done with her in there, not at this phase.
So, at the beginning of Summer, we bit the bullet and started her at the sweetest little Montessori daycare part time. She loves it there, her teachers are fantastic, and she has learned and grown SO MUCH in these past two months. For a few hours a couple of times a week, I feel like I am getting my life back on track. I absolutely love my days with her, AND I am in such great and terrible need of some art-making and of getting my business back together so I can feel like myself again.
Because let's be honest for a second. Children are wonderful and beautiful and amazing, curious, busy, snuggly (I live on her snuggles right now)...and exhausting. Whatever life you had before is completely changed, and it is HARD. And that's ok. I am the kind of person who needs a lot of time to myself, and I haven't had that time in many, many months. I am a person who needs to make art or I feel like my soul is withering. It's ok to love your kids and to need time away from them. It's a funny thing about being a mom--all of these contradictory emotions co-exist. It seems like you wouldn't be able to feel so grateful for snuggles and at the same time an incredible urge for some time alone. But you can.
How do you make time time for the things you are passionate about? I would love to know.